Faux Pas Fix with Anne Zeumer: Modesty

click to view gallery

Faux Pas Fix with Anne Zeumer - Every month in Arts and Lifestyle

By Anne Zeumer
Staff Writer


Before I delve into a torrent of more specific articles, I must thoroughly address two main principles of dressing oneself effectively. To generalize all the necessary elements into just two main headings is a task a bit too monstrous for my talents, but I’ve chosen two which I find most applicable to the situation here at Stony Brook. These two highly neglected principles beg to be recognized and understood, the aforementioned being modesty and proportion. This week, modesty will be featured.


Modesty, though not usually a priority in higher circles of couture or metropolitan fashion, plays a more significant role in a collegiate atmosphere. Male modesty is not as much of a problem as female modesty, in that even when a male is dressing in an immodest fashion, he is not exposing that much of his bare flesh, as immodest females do. Flat out, in a college or professional setting, your midriff should not be exposed, your skirt should not fall any higher than a few inches above the knee, and your décolletage should not be so profound as to serve as a distraction to those in your immediate vicinity. Accordingly, makeup bordering on the theatrical is inappropriate. Very dark eye makeup with a lot of bold, intense color is something which should be reserved for night, with very few exceptions.


I imagine that many of the feminist camp will accuse me of being old fashioned, saying that I want to suppress a woman’s right to express herself as she wants, and so on. This is not what I am trying to do. I believe that women want and deserve respect, just as much as men, if you insist on making a comparison. At a university especially, the respect women should strive for is respect based on their intelligence, personality, and personal integrity. By dressing immodestly, you make yourself appear insecure. It is as if you are revealing more and more of yourself physically to compensate for what you [feel you] lack mentally. The way you dress should assert your personality and style, without exposing yourself physically or making yourself look like a mere sex object.


Please don’t misinterpret me and think that you should dress like a nun. On the contrary, experimenting with style and color are things I do myself, and certainly encourage in others. The point is that there is a time and a place for everything. Your 8:20am Philosophy class is not the time or the place to debut your newest silver metallic halter top. Save that for Friday night. Instead, you could opt for a horizontally striped boat neck tee with everyone’s beloved black leggings and a pair of silver metallic flats. You see, you don’t have to abandon your style based on your setting; you just have to adjust it a bit. Think rationally before you dress: a) Where are you going? And b) What is the weather like? Be yourself and be modest at the same time, and I promise you’ll start getting the respect you deserve. Next week, look for the next piece in our sequence on proportion.




Look for "Faux Pas with Anne Zeumer" each week in the Arts and Lifestyle section. For last week's column, click here .